Sunday, July 27, 2008

Turbulent changes in time - 27 July '08

Time passes by just as I utter breathlessly in the struggle of life. Time passed by too quickly and me who is non-athletic form of human barely able to catch a breath. Why can't we stop the time from moving? Why can't we stop river from flowing?

Exams flooded into my schedules simultaneously, yet there's no motivation to study till the right time came. Microbiology, Management of Principles, Metabolism, Enzymology... I was lucky enough to pass my Management paper, but I can confirm that I will fail my Microbiology paper with shitty kitty bloody betty colour. Metabolism and Enzymology are in the stable condition till further notice. My midterm 1 passed just like that, and the next Midterm 2 will drop by very soon. Real soon. I feel suffocated. I need more time. I have 2 damn big panda eyes already. Instead of sleeping 10 pm, I start to have habit to sleep at 1 or 2 am. Doing revision is very stressful, especially when you are a dilettante. Is this the uni life that was supposed to be relaxing and enjoyable? Why do I feel even harder compared to form 6? It's as if I fell into a swamp and need help from anyone who passes by to pull me out. Early this sem I told myself, I told my friends, I told them I won't borrow or copy anyone's lab report. But gradually, I start borrowing and "use it as references" at dire times (when the deadline is near). The 'GOD' reminded me when we were chatting in library. He looked at me unsatisfied, but yes he was right. I broke my own promise, basicly relying too much on friends. I rely too much on him. From now on, I will depend on myself and not the 'GOD'. Maybe just a little... We must learn to release stress, whether it's studies stress or it is family pressure or relation conflicts. I enjoy the time we hang around in BTS, Sg Wang, Midvalley, Pavilion or even JJ in Wangsa Maju. Thanks.

UTAR life has changed me a lot. Now my computer can surf net for info rather than just chatting in msn and download movies. I learn to pool and bowl once awhile. I learn to talk crap. All these, thanks to my friends. I proudly present The Pneumonia Gang (废 gang) aka Single Club. Members: miao - kRazy pieW, kek - Im NooB K3K, sk - Im NooBlet louis, and bui bui - Ray Tan). In unison, we fight for each other in many battlefields, such as copy reports, fake signatures in attendance list, study partners, play mates and etc. At least, I think I have found my 靠岸... which will guide me for another 2 years through. Few years back I was bound to ego and image (if I have any) that must be uphold while dark shadows tailed me from the back. Now I have released myself from the cage and start to realize how beautiful outside world can be. I start smiling and laughing, acting and moving like a sotong, talk very loud and shamelessly. My true self has shocked many friends. However behind my smile is still a mask that even I cannot recognise. I do not try to hide it, it's just hidden. It is the unpresentable ugly side of me. The 10 years mask was well hidden and there will never be a right time to destroy it. I remember Jekyll and Hyde...

Biochem Year 2 Sem 1 Group 1 celebrated a lot of his coursemates birthday. We celebrated Siau Chien's birthday on 12 June, Shiau Li's on 30th June and Carol's on July 08. We are planning for See Lok's celebration on 30 July at karaoke and steamboat. Wish them all the best.

林宇中 new album 干物世界 was released 10th July but I only manage to grab it on 16th. That was the day (16 July) 林宥嘉 came to Sg Wang too. So we (Piew, Shiau Li, Kelvin and me) watched the performance together while Sze Koon and bui bui went somewhere else. I started listening to other artists such as 林宥嘉 and 杨宗纬 thanks to Piew my buddy (check out Krazy pieW in my friends list). I cannot deny 杨宗纬 is a good singer, very talented and lucky performer but 林宥嘉 is a bit off. Lari music and broken voice during the performance that day was not tolerable. Listening to the very same songs by 林宇中 for many years, I think it's time for me to change a bit and accept new changes. Maybe I shouldn't keep myself being exposed, maybe I need more input. I am in the middle of un-conservative-ing myself. I am afraid of new thing. New things mean new faces, new environment, need more effort to adapt. But all these are needed for turbulent changes and I know I can do it. I have made my 1st step and there will be another step to the road not taken. Few years back music is very disturbing pollution thanks to Linkin Park. Now I found a new essence to my life which was music. 林宇中 as the energy and motivation source while 杨宗纬 is the filler...

Since I had kept myself long enough from exposure, I think 林宇中 new album would be very suitable. But after listen properly to all songs, I was quite disappointed. "Quite". Only few songs that I like, while other songs are so so. The album consisting of 13 tracks:
01. 上楼 (just tune only)
02. 干物女*
03. 远远*
04. 改嫁*
05. 瓶盖*
06. 维他命C我加你*
07. 放空 (just tune only)
08. 第六个地点*
09. 逆跳表
10. 至少爱过*
11. 幸福马戏团*
12. 抢玫瑰 (featured JJ)
13. 下楼 (just tune only)

The songs with * sign are the only few that I like. There might be changes as the previous songs such as 不打烊的店 and 猫头鹰. Am I expecting too much from a 30 year old guy? Is this his limit? I believe he can do better in future and I am anticipating his 签唱会 in KL. I might fall in love with other songs when he perform live just as 不打烊的店 and 猫头鹰. This is music, nothing is certain. Everyone has different taste but my senses are more complicated. Now he is running several events in Perak. I just hope he doesn't come to KL when my finals hit the clock.

As of 16th July, my rose bloomed a rose. Of 'coz a rose plant blooms out a rose, but I mean... Yeah there is a flower in the rose pot!!! I cut the flower previously on 26 May and now 16 July it blooms another new one. My 1st flower!!! That's not all. 27 July, there are 5 more little flower buds ready to bloom. This is another great success for me. I can sell them when Valentine's around the corner earning a penny or two. Or as Kek suggested, I can give it to someone I love? But definitely not Pei Zhi or package G. I will keep the rose stay healthy and grow. In the future if I fail to become Biochemist, at least I can start selling flowers.

My last hair cut was on 5th May. After 3 months of wearing "helmet" (means thick hair), I had my hair cut at Genting Klang Silver Cut after Enzymology midterm. The bad point is he took such a long time to cut making me almost fell asleep. But the good point is he cut my hair and I think it's quite nice compared to previous cut. But another bad point is, he didn't teach me how to style my hair. But a good point is I think it is quite cheap considering RM 15 compared to my previous RM 13 QQ CuT. I need professional Sze Koon and bui bui to teach me how to wax my hair. Now that I have a new look, je ne sais quoi attitude (my true behaviour), friends, all I need now is not much of luck to succeed. As Robert Falcon Scott said, "To Strive, To Seek, To Find but Not To Yield". FKL lion patrol's motto : Spirit is Success.

[Jino] - A man's not a man unless he knows how to shoot