Sunday, January 4, 2015

A not so rendezvous

Dear FY,

When you said you wanna spend a day with me on 27th, I took it so seriously I reserved 3 days just for you. You see, I was merely planning ahead for the unexpected so I thought 3 days were good. Christmas movie... Boxing Day hang out... I refused to join any.

Oh no... you were out of town. Change of plan. I cleaned my room in hope you will drop by. Unlike 2 years ago, this time my room was ready. 

It appeared our rendezvous turned up days later but I was very delighted you could make it before you return.

In the contrary to my expectation, that night did not end on a high note. The dinner was a mess. I screwed our dream.

My feeling faded as time passes. You barely respond to my text largely due to the time difference. Your voice could not reach me this far. Pictures are not as frequent as they used to be. Or I would rather say, you have stopped posting.

Do you know, FY? I too did not realize I miss you this much till you held my hand. I was very emotional to be truth. There was an instance I wish we could keep driving and our hands locked to each other. Perhaps driving aimlessly in the silent night would be good. We were closer when we were in the car. Don't you agree?

I tried my best not to cry. Sorry FY that I am soft and weak. I simply could not hold my tears. My tongue tasted bitter. My heart ached till I stopped breathing. Well, breathing part was exaggeration... But in reality I had few sleepless nights.

Can't be sure if I get it correctly... your smile was kinda sorrow. Perhaps you were just too exhausted with the trip.

Anyway I am really thankful you spent your precious time with me. Such memorable night to end 2014 and surely your words will be my motivation to kick start my 2015.

Dear FY,

My feelings are real. You are always beautiful in my eyes. Hugs.

Yours truly,

[Jino] - A man's not a man unless he knows how to shoot