护廷十三隊十番隊隊長 - 日番谷冬獅郎 (Part 1)

Related post:
Part 1, Part 2, Part 3

What does the title mean? If you are some fans of Bleach, it means 'Gotei 13, 10th Division captain - Hitsugaya Toushiro'.

I love him on first sight. He is brilliant and smart. Cool and yeng. To achieve the rank of captain at young age, he's definitely more capable when he develops his full strength. He was voted as the most popular character in the Weekly Shone Jump's Bleach popularity polls with 8278 votes.

霜天に坐せ, 氷輪丸!

Soten ni zase, Hyorinmaru!

卍解! 大紅蓮氷輪丸

Bankai! Daiguren Hyorinmaru

Winner of the poll

Blindly adoring him though he is said to be the weakest captain of all due to his young age and inexperience, he definitely attracts my attention all the time. 'Coz I like ice element that's why I easily fall in love. Even the nick Ice God origin from him ^^.

This week's Bleach manga chapter 355 is coming out, and I peek of the raw spoilers somewhere. To my surprise (in fact, it is expected) my favourite is cut down by Espada No. 3 Halibel after resurrecion...

My heart is so pain now, I cannot read further. He is defeated, his coolness evaporates. Unless there're still some tricks up his sleeves, he is most probably done for. To see my favourite captain slashed/ chopped like that is really unsightful.




[Jino] - A man's not a man unless he knows how to shoot

Days covered in honey

Saturday 18 April
Hins's concert sparks magically in Genting today. Anyway I am not going - nothing to do with me, I am not any of his fans.

The day starts with a bad morning. The sky is hazy with smoky hazards detrimental to health. And I thought some houses are on fire.

Oh... not houses on fire. Is spraying mosquitoes killing spray

There must be a lot of people died 'coz of mosquitoes otherwise they won't spend so much on the concentrated smokes. Although the smoke is detrimental, humans' lives are in great danger lately. So I raise my legs to support this people in banishing the population of Aedes. Many have fallen to Dengue and Chikungunya, countless lives lost 'coz of the tiny insects. For the sake of humanity, mosquitoes of male or female, Aedes or not, extinct or not, they must be eradicated. They are more than enough to exist in text book.

Due to financial restriction, I am forced to make sandwiches for lunch today. Don't underestimate my sandwiches, they're actually packed with 100% love haha. I made 6 pieces, which should satisfy my lunch enough.

Supposing that we've got the day planned quite nicely. Firstly we will walk around Bukit Bintang, mostly Pavilion while wait for Austin's lunch time. After that we will have Manhattan Fish Market as snacks 'coz I have RM 20 voucher. As exams coming soon, we thought of studying in Starbucks as aromatic caffeine could keep the brain awake for the day.

But the day does not turn out as planned. The day is so hot!!! I couldn't endure the sweat for long, I don't feel comfortable at all. 'Coz of sweat I go emo, emo, emo. Big hot bright sun radiates painful harmful UV light, kills me slowly!!! After meeting Austin and lunch, we look for Manhattan Fish Market showering with sweat. To think deeper, where can I find 1? Is there any outlet in BB? NO!!! BB doesn't have MFM!!! Aiya, apa la. Bodohnya.

We substitute MFM with J.Co last minute. When J.Co is in our sight, we see no queue today. I wonder what happen. Is economic crisis be that strong? Wonderful donuts I say, but I prefer less sweet snacks and a cup of coffee ^^. We drop Starbucks and have J.Co in the car instead, head back to where we come from - home.

Watched Gokusen whole night with Edwin. Sweat makes me even more emo. Arghh!!! I hate hot season. Why is KL so FUCKING hot!!!

Tonight I leave the house extra early, allowing me chance to study at home. Exams start to pressure me, my legs start trembling feebly like jelly. My table now looks like a pile of rubbish mounting, clearing them is no easy task. I touch up my last painting of the week, keep all my painting equipments far away to allow me time to concentrate properly into studies.

I name this painting - Wish to light your path.

I really need to study!!! 3 important subjects in a go, progress is 30%. Hurry!!!


Sunday 19 April
Not to mention how dull it is today, studying is the most boring thing to do in a hospital. I visit my sick grandpapa in Hospital Putrajaya today. Go all the way there to visit him. You should come around and have a look, it's so different from KL. Even the hospital can match the hotels in Genting. Can you now imagine how nice the hospital is?

What's Putrajaya? Established by Mahathir, it is hopefully turned into the most developed city in Malaysia which outmatched KL. Founder of the cities are the major concern for the government. The relocation was to reduce the congestion in the city and to ensure that KL will continue to develop as Malaysia's principal business and financial centre. But from what I see, KL was established by Yap Ah Loy, a Chinese. If Malaysia's most important capital was founded by a Chinese, malu la Malay? So government spent billions into the Putrajaya project in the name of development but in fact government used our tax to develop their own name - the most advanced city in Malaysia which was founded by a Malay.

Back to the hospital, it is quite grand compared to HUKM and HKL. Air-conditioned, new building and greenery which are different from KL's traffic congestion, pollution and concrete buildings. Some of the drawbacks are isolated from main cities, and also inexperienced doctors. Even the street lights by the roadside in Putrajaya is extra special and beautiful.

Hopefully my grandpapa will be fine (though all humans will die eventually), I study whole afternoon, frozen in the room.


Monday 20 April
I break the very promise I made 3 weeks ago. I let the pictures do the talking...

Can I not mention where are these taken? There goes my lanjiao, chopped off cook 酸甜 lanjiao if anyone finds out. Sweet and sour lanjiao nyam nyam!!! Hints: We go for lunch buffet. What a surprise. I rate 30% for today +1% for playing my favourite song Melodi by Rynn!!!


Tuesday 21 April
The day Edwin goes back to Kampar comes again, and it's today. After depart him at Puduraya, I head to UTAR to collect my exam slip and at the same time discuss pass year questions with Pneumonia gang. When they first saw me, they comment a lot of this...

If I say, it is done by the baby next door, he sucks my neck while I am asleep, will you believe me? If I say I make this myself, lagi la no one will believe. So I don't need to explain any further haha. So what if it's a curry kai or strawberry? I don't care lol... Stop questioning, hit the bell, and go on life guys.




[Jino] - A man's not a man unless he knows how to shoot

Cold lame jokes

Haha I woke up so early this morning, I wasn't motivated enough to start my studies. Due to some reason and created opportunity, which I am so lazy to explain here, I met Austin near his house. We chatted for few hours before I departed home for my lunch and studies and etc etc...

Not too long before I laid my ass on the chair, again I grabbed my brushes, worked on some ideas I had in mind. I guess I got addicted into painting. But I dropped them off 'coz I really need to study.

Holding Neurogenetics for 1 hour, itchy hands started clicking on google, searching for some excitement in the afternoon. Haha these may seem old and lame, but I laughed 'coz first time hearing...

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One night, as I was studying, Brian was in msn and I asked him to entertain me 'coz I was too bored. After awhile he asked me questions:

Brian: 2 guys were sitting by the jetty. Unfortunately 1 of them fell into the sea. If the 1 fell into the sea died and he is called dead body, then the other guy call?
Jino: Live body? I don't know.
Brian: No, he calls Jiu Ming.
Jino: How come?
Brian: Jiu Ming!!! Jiu Ming!!! HELP!!!

Then I asked the same question at Edwin, but he heard the joke before so he knew the answer. Instead, Edwin asked me another silly question, which then I forwarded to Brian for revenge.

Jino: An aeroplane passes through the cloud, so later it will come out of the cloud. But what if the aeroplane goes down into the sea, where will it come out from?
Brian: *Err... Eh... Hmm...* Open la.
Jino: In newspaper headline lor.

Haha don't know if he got it or not. He asked me the last question of the night.

Brian: A cat, a goat and a pig. They smuggle drugs, lets say heroin into Japan. Unfortunately they were caught by the custom. In your opinion, on who will the custom find the heroin?
Jino: *Err... Eh... Hmm...* Must be goat la.
Brian: Why leh?
Jino: The goat always 'Meeeeeeee'.
Brian: No la. Salah. Try again.
Jino: How come wrong? Open la.
Brian: Answer is pig.
Jino: How come?
Brian: Zhu Chang Fen - 猪肠粉 (same sound like pig keep powder).
Jino: *swt swt swt*

________________________________________________________________

Dildo 1 - Voodoo dildo

The company tells him that he will have to take a long business trip to Japan to clinch an important deal. Unfortunately his wife is known for cheating on him when he goes away. He still loves her but every time she does it, it breaks his heart and this trip will be the longest he has been. He also knows that she tries hard not to cheat and has done lesser and lesser. Having given up smoking he knows how hard it is to shake an addiction so he decides to go to a sex shop to get her something to keep her amused.

On his way home he goes to a little sex shop. He looks around for a bit but doesn't really find anything satisfactory. Just as he is about to leave the owner calls him over.

"You're looking for something special?"
"Yes, I need something to keep my wife busy while I'm away so she won't cheat."

The owner looks at him hard and then reaches under the counter to pull out a small wooden box with mystical carvings and pictures on it. He slides off the lid and inside sits a carved wooden dildo.

"What's so special about that?" asks the man
"Watch... Voodoo dildo, door."

To the mans surprise the dildo rises from the box and starts fucking the keyhole of the door.

"Voodoo dildo, box."

The dildo stops and drops back into its box.

"That's amazing. I'll take it."

After paying he walks home with a smile on his face. The next morning, after packing he gives his wife her present. At first she is dubious but after showing her the door trick she seems quite pleased, so he leaves on his trip.

After a week she feels the need for a shag but as she wants to stop cheating she instead gets out the dildo.

"Voodoo dildo, my pussy."

The dildo rises obediently from the box and starts to shag her brains out. An hour and ten orgasms later she feels better. Through all the sexual ecstasy however she forgets the turn off command. And as she is well into orgasm number eleven she can't think straight. She tries to pull it but it doesn't work. So she decides that she will have to go to hospital and have it removed.

In the car on the way there she has another orgasm that makes her swerve dangerously. A police officer sees this and pulls her over. He walks up to the window which she rolls down.

"Have you been drinking?"
"No" the now distraught woman replies. "A voodoo dildo is shagging me and I can't get it to stop and I'm on my way to hospital to have it removed."
"Voodoo dildo" the officer laughs "My arse."


Dildo 2
One day this guy comes to work at a dildo shop. His boss leaves for the day and puts him in charge of the shop.

About an hour later a black haired lady comes in and asks "How much for your black dildos?"
The guy says "30 bucks"
"And how much for your white dildos?" asks the lady.
Again the man says "30 bucks for the black and 30 bucks for the white"
So she takes the black one and leaves.

A while later a brunette comes in to the store and asks "How much for your white dildos?"
The man responds "30 bucks"
She asks "And how much for your black dildos?"
"30 bucks for the white and 30 bucks for the black" replies the man.
So she takes the white one leaves.

About an hour later a blond walks through the door and asks "How much are your dildos?"
The guys says "All our dildos are 30 bucks"
Then she looks up behind the man on a shelf and ask "How much for that plain one?"
The man responds "Oh, that one is special. That will cost you $250"
The blond agrees and takes it.

Later that day the boss come back and asks "So what did you sell today?"
The man says "I sold a black dildo, a white dildo , and your thermos flask for $250!"

________________________________________________________________

Gay 1 - Birthday present
Two gay guys are going at it. After they finish, one turns to the other and says "Hey, I feel something in my ass... See if you can feel anything." So his boyfriend put his finger in his ass and feels around. "I don't feel anything," the boyfriend says. So the first guy says, "No deeper... I'm sure I feel something."

So the boyfriend put his hand in the guys ass and feels around. "I'm telling you there is nothing there" says the boyfriend. "No really," the guys says, "I can feel it, look deeper." So the boyfriend put his whole arm in the guy's ass and is feeling around when he touches something.

"Hey, I found something," says the boyfriend. "Well take it out," says the guy. The boyfriend pulls his hand out of the guys ass, looks at it and sees it is a Rolex. The guy starts singing, "Happy Birthday to you, Happy birthday to you..." =.="'


Gay 2 - Gay problems
Three guys go to see a witch doctor about their problems. One has a smoking problem, one is an alcholic and one is gay but wants to change. The doctor put a curse on each of them that if any of them indulge in their habits again they will die.

Two days later the alcholic died because he gave in and had to drink.

The next day the gay guy and the smoker are walking down the street together. The smoker sees a cigarette lying on the ground and stops to stare at it.

The gay guy looked at him and said "if you bend over and pick that up we are both fucked"


Gay 3 - A couple of shots
There was this man who walked into a bar and ordered 10 shots of whiskey.
The bartender asks, "What's the matter?"
The man says, "I found out my brother is gay and marrying my best friend."

The next day the same man comes in and orders 12 shots of whiskey.
The bartenders asks, "What's wrong this time?"
The man says, "I found out that my son is gay."

The next day the same man comes in the bar and orders 15 shots of whiskey.
Then the bartender asks, "Doesn't anyone in your family like women?"
The man looks up and says, "Apparently my wife does."


Gay 4 - Construction worker
Construction worker on the 5th floor of a building needs a handsaw. So he spots another worker on the ground floor and yells down to him, but he can't hear him. So the worker on the 5th floor tries sign language. He pointed to his eye meaning "I", pointed to his knee meaning "need", then moved his hand back and forth in a hand saw motion. The man on the ground floor nods his head, pulls down his pants, whips out his cock and starts masturbating. The worker on 5th floor gets so pissed off he runs down to the ground floor and says, "What the fuck is your problem!!! I said I needed a hand saw!" The other guy says, "I knew that! I was just trying to tell you - I'm coming!"


Gay 5 - Gay parrot
A guy decides that maybe he'd like to have a pet and goes to a pet shop. After looking around he spots a parrot sitting on a little perch; it doesn't have any feet or legs. The guy says out loud, "Geez, I wonder what happened to this parrot?"

"I was born this way," says the parrot. "I'm a defective parrot."
"Ha, ha," the guy laughs. "It sounded like this parrot actually understood what I said and answered me."
"I understand every word," says the parrot. "I am a highly intelligent and thoroughly educated bird."
"Yeah?" the guy asks. "Then answer this: how do you hang onto your perch without any feet?"
"Well," the parrot says, "this is a little embarrassing, but since you asked, I will tell you. I wrap my little parrot penis around this wooden bar, kind of like a little hook. You can't see it because of my feathers."
"Wow," says the guy, "you really can understand and answer, can't you?"
"Of course. I speak both Spanish and English. I can converse with reasonable competence on almost any subject: politics, religion, sports, physics, philosophy. And I am especially good at ornithology. You should buy me; I am a great companion."

The guy looks at the $200.00 price tag. He says. "I can't afford that."
"Pssst," the parrot hisses, motioning the guy over with one wing. "Nobody wants me because I don't have any feet. You can get me for $20.00; just make an offer."

The guy offers twenty dollars and walks out with the parrot. Weeks go by and the parrot is sensational. He's funny; he's interesting; he's a great pal, he understands everything, sympathizes, and gives good advice. The guy is delighted.

One day the guy comes home from work and the parrot says, "Pssst," and motions him over with one wing. The guy goes up close to the cage. "I don't know if I should tell you this or not," says the parrot, "but it's about your lover and the mailman."

"What?" asks the guy.
"Well," the parrot says, "when the mailman came to the door today, your lover greeted him in a pair of briefs that showed everything and kissed him on the mouth."
"What happened then?" asks the guy.
"Then the mailman came into the house and put his hand on your lovers crotch and began petting him all over," reports the parrot.
"My God!" the guy says. "Then what?"
"Then he pulled down the briefs, got down on his knees and began to lick him, starting with his chest, slowly going down and down." The parrot pauses for a long time...
"What happened? What happened?" says the frantic guy.
"That's what pisses me off. I don't know." said the parrot. "I got a hard-on, and fell off my fucking perch."


Gay 6
Peter invites his Mum for tea.
She notices his flat mate Joe is very handsome, slightly camp and although she suspected Peter's gay he denies that anything is going on, and says that they are only flat mates.

A week later Joe says to Peter, "Ever since your Mum came to tea, I can't find the frying pan". Peter emails his Mum and says, "Dear Mum, I'm not saying that you DID take the frying pan, and I'm not saying you DID NOT take the frying pan, but it's been missing ever since u came for tea. Love Peter".

His Mum replies, "Dear son, I'm not saying you DO sleep with Joe and I'm not saying you DO NOT sleep with Joe, but if he was sleeping in his own bed he would have found the fucking frying pan by now. Love Mum".

Moral of the story... NEVER LIE TO YOUR MOTHER


Gay 7 - Out of the closet
Yeah, I tried hinting to my parents. We were sat at the dinner table and I said to my mum, "Could you pass the gravy to a Homosexual?" She passed it to my dad!!!

________________________________________________________________

Then I went to fetch Edwin from Puduraya lol... Have a nice day




[Jino] - A man's not a man unless he knows how to shoot

Healthy way too good to kill boredom

While studying transposon for MB yesterday (16 April 2009), I was distracted by xxx rated stuff from my friend. Although I am not a 100% pervert, but I couldn't resist the temptation lol. After a peep I offed my computer in the afternoon to concentrate on studies but to no avail. Therefore, I randomly reached my kertas lukisan, brushes and left over water colour paints, thought of painting something while studying MB in rhythmic pace. But the final result were:- a completed painting and a prototype draft of my previous post - Fugly and 2 slides of MB notes. Studies is too hard to do at home. A perfect study place is Starbucks with refreshing aroma of Mocha Frapuccino on the table.

I replicated the painting from my artwork in Form 1 Pendidikan Seni final exams entitled "Pemandangan pada waktu senja" which scored 99% from Cikgu Zuraidi. A lot of screwed up parts especially the tongkang. Compared to my previous drawing, I like the painting 9 years ago more.

Mum: Why waste time on drawing? Go study la!!!
Me: How do you know I am not studying?
Mum: Of 'coz I know. You are using your notes as alas surat khabar below your painting!!!
Me: Oops... Bocor.

Careful, paint is still wet...




[Jino] - A man's not a man unless he knows how to shoot

Fugly

How should I put these in words? I need time to rearrange my mind so that it's easier to read. Not meant for anyone to understand, but is for my own understanding. From here on please use your own imagination. OK let's go.

23 years ago, I stayed in my mum's womb for 9 months, and practically came into this living world 22 years ago. After that, for 12 years people liked to cubit my cheek and my pet pet 'coz they're just too smooth and juicy. But I started feeling bad after the 12 years of cuteness and innocence.

After my primary school hood, acne and pimples broke out in tremendous amount all over my face. Cheek, chin, neck, forehead, even eyebrow, you name it, there will be acne and pimples. You might think... Ceh you were 12 ma. That's normal for teenagers to have outbreaks here n there often and always. Until 18 also you will still have acne pimples. Dirt and sweat in scouts, improper eating diet, hormone imbalance, puberty, toxic etc etc. Smooth skin is for girls, get over it. Normal normal... My mum kept telling me the same thing and said it will be fine after certain period. With her reasoning I made through my life up to now, 22 years old.

Can I use back the same old lame excuses for my outbreaks now? Dirty, sweat, diet imbalance, hormone imbalance, puberty, tension? 22 years old I am now leh. My situation now is worse than 10 years ago, let me tell you. Is it genetics? Cannot be, none of my family or uncles aunties have this problem. What's my problem? I don't even dare to look at mirror, afraid that my mum beats me up if the mirror breaks.

Imagine this. You take a nap in the afternoon, and the moment you wake up, there're 4 headless pimples/ acne/ whatever grow on your face. Hopefully they will go away, but dream is dream. The next day they turn black, become headless pussy puss. If you touch them you feel the pain. You can also feel them berdenyut-denyut inside alive. After 2-3 days, they become bigger, growing into bigger clusters and formed a big black patch on your face. Not just one patch but all over your face. And after few days again the cycle repeats. Before you get the old patches gone, the new one butt in, your face now inflamed reddish and blackish all over.

Sorry if anyone get disgusted, but this is my condition right now. Quite bad right?

So what if I have acne/ pimples, you ask? Face is not important? Image is secondary to heart? No one judge a book by it's cover? All these, I know are some of the words used to comfort me. But nonetheless they're quite hypocrite for saying these.

If there's something I care bout, it will be my face. I may act very sohai, talk like jibai, mingle with lanjiao kias, dance like sotong, tak malu, pig. In fact I never have a reputation to start with. I don't care how people judge me by the way I act 'coz those are only my actions, which can be changeable and flexible. I act them out, that's not I behave normally. But there's something that I can't hide or cover but to let everyone feel disgusted. It's my face I hate the most, as I am a fucking ugly Jino - fugly Jino.

I remember very well in Form 2 training Gary Yoong said this - Heng Chiang now I want you to look at Jino's face and count how many pimples are there on his face (laughing). I got away coolly, acted as if it's some kind of joke but deeply in my heart I felt needles poking. It's a humiliation he brought but he thinks that's funny. He slashed off my pride and took away my very last confidence I had.

Can I call this painful experience? I remember very well who else made fun of my look but expressing my anger makes me even fuglier, so I never do so. One of the ways I always do to reduce the counts of people see my face is to avoid eye contact. Weird, huh? Looking away so that they can't see me directly, then I am less fugly. If you see me sideways, I am only 50% fugly. If we make eye contact face to face and that's 100% fugly. Make sense? Haha at least I thought it was.

I tried few ways to improve my condition, from controlling my sleeping habit to trying facial products to eating habit, but my problem keeps "improving". Recently I thought of seeking dermatologist for help. If patients fail to heal themselves, they need to see a doctor some how. The person who has always rejected chemicals even at the verge of sickness now is taking chemicals into his mouth for the sake of beauty. I was planning to use my PTPTN money for this. It might not give satisfactory result, side effects and expensive but I would like to have a try. At least it's a try and fail rather than fail to try. If this method fails, then I am determined to admit that I am born a fugly. But who knows? Maybe I can be cured?

When the issue raised to 2 people, Edwin and my mum, we ended up into arguments. He does not allow me to seek dermatologist but I don't see the reason for his over reactions. He has the smooth baby cheek that I so envied, does he not understand the feeling of me being a fugly to go around scaring people? That's why I was so depressed and sad few days ago. 'Coz I thought he understands how I felt but he is just like other people - made my feeling 2 times down.

My mum is the "best". She agreed and allowed me to spend my PTPTN for dermatologist charges. The problem is my PTPTN money is kept in a saving account under me and my mum's name. So few days later, when I asked for the bank book to withdraw money, she advised me to wait longer see if my face improve or not. I told her I have waited long enough, I have waited 10 years! After few more conversation, she got heated up, shouted 我讲不要就不要啦。你听不明阿!!! literally means I SAY DON'T WANT MEANS DON'T WANT LA. DON'T UNDERSTAND AR!!! In the end, it's the money she concerns. Of 'coz, economy is not good, don't simply spend money, jimat la... But she just doesn't understand how desperate I am now. So now I can't assume my plan, 'coz I was not allowed to. You see how adults are so wicked? Cheating me like that and as if she's all correct. Hei!!! PTPTN is my money in the first place!!!

Why am I so desperate to become lengzai? Sorry you got the wrong idea. I am not desperate to be lengzai, but to become normal. I just want to get rid of my acne and pimples, not to become some super models or artists. Imagine you with this kind of problem and you want to kiss your mates. Yeer you so fugly, go away, keep skin la, break up. I don't have this situation yet, but let's just imagine. This is the humiliation even worse than stripping naked in front of many girls. Haha I am quite proud of my lanjiao and will impress them definitely lol but my face is just a turn off. You have to face your mates for the rest of your life, how can you afford to disgust them all the time with your fugly face? I am just too fugly, sometimes I wish I don't need to go out of this house and scare people.

First impression is too important whether you or me like it or not. I don't judge people based on personal image but I care bout how people think of me. I tend to be very attractive to some extend - my face is the worst and most terrible in classes, in scouts, in working places, everywhere. You want to learn an easy way to recognise Jino? Let's hear this out:

A: Hey pinjam scissors.
B: I don't have. Pinjam from Jino la.
A: Who is Jino?
B: Neh the most fugly one or The most acne and pimples one...

Easy to remember me right? Unless hiding, I simply stand out in the crowd. Look is not important? Nah... for me it's too important. It's a symbol of my confidence and courage.




[Jino] - A man's not a man unless he knows how to shoot

A lost journey

12th April - Sunday. I was in 8053, looking outside the windows to find out that it was already dark. How long had I slept? Yea, I was sleeping on the driving seat for time to pass by. I wasn't in mood to go home at that time. When it comes to studies, home has no place for me. The night was so dark but I could see the moon moving away from the clouds, slowly and clearly. It was surprising to see the clock written 3.52 a.m. OMG!!! My phone recorded 28 miss calls from home. My mum must be very worried for my absence since 8 hours ago. I returned the call but very mysteriously I couldn't get through - "I'm sorry. The number you've dialed, is unavailable. Please try later. Thank you." Wondering what's going on, I hurried back home as my heart worrying something bad might happen. As I drove I could feel the warm breeze of the morning but together with DBKL odour greeting.

As I made myself slightly concious, I looked outside the window. Again and again I couldn't recall the place I stopped to sleep. In my hand held a glass of whiskey coke. I didn't remember anything at all. The night was so dark, no street light, all houses switched off lights, no car on the roads. It as if there's no sign of living. I tried to switch on my car light but only small light was available. I took quite awhile to adapt to the unlit zone, encouraged myself to move on.

Quickly I drove off the place, but to my astonishment I reached highway which I don't recognize at all. Again there's not street light along the highway. It's a straight road all the way with houses by the side. Signboard could not be seen for the first few km, next few km, the whole highway, confusing me even more. Where am I? It wasn't a pleasant driving session. I could hardly see my path, so I drive very slowly to be cautious.

After long driving, finally there's sign of living but it wasn't any kind of sign. There, in the middle of the highway, stood a policeman in his uniform with his light stick, swinging left and left asked me to stopped to the left side. He was a Chinese policeman, asked for my IC and licence, asked me reasons for not switching my big light. A Chinese policeman? Deep in my heart cold sweat swirled, raising my suspicion. How could a policeman stand in the middle of the road without any road block mechanism? It didn't make sense. Very panic, I sped off full speed ahead. I just want to get home safely. Looked at the clock, it's still 3.52 a.m. WTF after so long, time had not moved??? Is it a joke or what? When I tried to reach my phone, the battery was empty. How is this possible?

I was expecting the police to chase after me in his car. But to my surprise I heard loud screams and some sort of chanting from afar. It reminded me of those ghost stories where a lady ghost tumpang your car, so don't look back at your back mirror. Although I was never afraid of ghost, not to believe in one in the 1st place, it's still eerie to think bout it. I dismissed the thought and looked back. A bunch of people running after me, in their hands are torches and sticks and durians, dressed in red cap and red shirt.

I was convinced they were the Thai protesters, they shouted so damn loud, speak in Thai I thought. But why were they chasing me? I AM NO PM!!! Already damn gelaba, now come another scary protesters, I offed my air cond, drove even faster, I could hear my engine shrieked and my mind was racing just as fast as the car. I was so scared. I didn't care if I knock down someone or kill anyone. I just want to get back home safely. God damn.

The further I drive, the darker the night. Now I couldn't see a single shit. Without realizing I had already reached the end of highway, fell off the road with the car headed down. Imagine it's like an incomplete highway bridge. I could feel my heart separated from my body. I shouted so damn loud but it was a silent fall. But as I fell, I could now see lights, high buildings and cars. OMG was I on the cloud all the while? I cannot stop shouting and my body trembled so badly.

I was in such condition of helpless and remorse for my pass deeds as I closed my eyes awaiting to reach the Earth. I could see things getting larger and larger, nearer and nearer. Am I going to die?

I was showered in cold sweat, to realize it was all but dream. Paralyzed for few minutes, while waiting my senses to return, I checked my time. Damn it's 4 a.m. and I got spooky goosebumps all over. ARGHH!!!




[Jino] - A man's not a man unless he knows how to shoot

To face my finals

I cannot agree more that time is quickly running past. Blink an eye, it's final exams already. Progress? Not much. I don't even have the time to sort out my notes!!!

Big pile of unsorted notes


Semua pasal agama - Moral

Genetics - Dr. Gideon is such a nice man. We always drop comments in Facebook lol


Ini notes from Dr. "K"


Cruel Dr. Teh - never mercy


Aha... Ini dia lab manual. Too depressed, too sad, too pressured - torn up whole book in anger

I need to buck up my speed, there's only 12 days left...

[Jino] - A man's not a man unless he knows how to shoot

Don't worry this's not happening

[Jino] - A man's not a man unless he knows how to shoot

Nice fought battle

When was the last time we fought? PC Fair 13 Dec 2008. We fought well, at least we played a lot of emotions.

Another fight had just ended. All fights are not intended. I don't wish to fight, but I stand on my ground which I think best suit me and do least harm to all parties. If clashing of ideas are called fighting, I don't think I will have chance to rest anymore. Right?

Do you remember the reason behind both fights now? Now are we equal already?

Time to time we fight more often and get tenser each time. I hope war will not come, I don't want to die.

When all fights occur, who do I talk to? If I fight with them, I will have you to share. But now who else can I talk to? Roses or Ultraman?

I never imagine myself so emo at this rate. I thought I can be rational, or at least be patient is my only specialty. But when facing you I fail to tolerate, as I thought you are the one understanding me the most so I don't need explain many times. But it turns out to be me not understanding you enough. Maybe it's your way of caring that I couldn't understand? You care and I took it for granted? You worry and I ignored? Or has my emo blinded my rational senses?

It's my fault each fight occurs, I know. 'Coz I lost my tolerance... Am I getting stubborn? Do I start ignoring others feeling? Have I? Have I turned grosteque?

I regret changing into so open. If I am conservative and closed like a year ago, where my coolness was still peak, my attitude of quietness is my major defence... Perhaps fights will never happen, don't you agree? Maybe if I hide my emotion deep to myself we will not suffer like this?

That word never directly came out of my brain, I guarantee. I don't remember saying that if not 'coz of you. It's not what you think. I am sorry I used that word. I tarik balik and kill it.

Because of a simple, small matter and fights initiated, to think of it I felt so foolish...

I am sorry for all the damages of the fight. I don't know how else to apologize.




[Jino] - A man's not a man unless he knows how to shoot

Harder than I thought

I couldn't remember how long ago, but it should be ~2 months ago since I left my armor lying on the cold marble floor. Kind of pity, 'coz armor hopes to jump out into action but the day never come lol...

It was ~ a month ago I last saw you. I thought you will be coming back soon but feel disappointed to miss the chance. We're both busy, where comes the time to drop by?

I hold your pic high in the sky, but I could only see you in dark behind the sun. When I hold it up at night, the moonlight does not overwhelm the dark. Memories tend to fade even with pictures.

Talk on the phone and we will burst into arguments. After lonely now showered with emptiness. Trying to be rational isn't playing significant role here. You made me feel so tired and feeble, cold and scared. Why do we always end up like that? Am I the one losing my tolerance?

Last time my inbox is easily fulled in just an hour. As time goes, my inbox never full anymore. Sometimes I call but not attended. Even if I manage to get through it doesn't last long. What's happening? You left me in question without clues of your whereabout. I started doubting you without a clear reason.

I am sick of this. It's not how I want it to be. Post effect of LDR?

Bleach Chapter 353 - The ash. Finally Hueco Mondo arc is coming to an end.

Na Na Na - 吴克群 & 王心凌. Very cute and nice song ^^.

[Jino] - A man's not a man unless he knows how to shoot

Tri-election 7 April

BN retained the Batang Ai state seat since 2006 state election while PAS and PKR retained Bukit Gantang and Bukit Selambau state seat respectively since 2008 election.

Nizar PAS won with increased majority of 2789 against Ismail BN in Bukit Gantang yesterday. BN’s hopes to increase its support by fielding a local candidate did not materialise. Duh? This by-election is a referendum on BN's move in capturing Perak state from PR by getting Jelapang assemblyman Hee Yit Foong, Behrang assemblyman Jamaluddin Mohd Radzi and Changkat Jering assemblyman Mohd Osman Mohd Jailu to leave PR to give their support to BN as independents. And very obvious the Perak people dissatisfied ^^, so what if Mahathir joined the field? It won't change the fact people hate Najis.

PKR’s Manikumar won the Bukit Selambau seat with a majority of 2,403 votes on Tuesday. The by-election was held following the resignation of incumbent assemblyman V. Arumugam on Feb 8 saw the loss of Ganesan from MIC and other 13 independent candidates.

Meanwhile, Malcolm from BN secured the seat in Batang Ai with majority 1854 votes against PKR Jawah. Jawah failed to overcome Malcolm, thus failing to win the seat. I don't understand why, of why people in Sarawak still support BN for they have given them enough chances for 50 years. Left 5 years right 5 years and they still give support to BN? Anyway Jawah played a good fight... People in Sarawak, buka lah mata besar besar!!!

UMNO deputy Muhyiddin denied BN has lost support and gave excuses that Najis new leadership has just started carrying out tasks thus people are still undecided. Isn't this time, when the time Najis rises to power, is the brightest moment Najis should have confidence with? Just like Abdullah rose to power and everyone saw hope in him, gave Abdullah a big win in 2004 election. But Najis lost the major 2 by-elections right after he took over premiership, shows the lost confidence of people on Najis? Najis, u sao pei la...

Though politics is fun and drama-like, but I hate politics. I don't mean PR is convincingly good and pure in helping us. But from what I see since I learn politics, BN has been so suck up I cannot let my vote to go for BN. Left 5 years right 5 years, do you think we will give you any more chance? You don't deserve it. I will at least struggle and die by voting PR rather than quietly wait for BN to change and rot to death. I try and fail but not fail to try...




[Jino] - A man's not man unless he knows how to shoot

Warrior of blue driving up-down town

The day started wee 12 a.m., my very 1st gelaba case - I had forgotten to print the group Genetics report. Asked Piew and Lok for help but helpless, asked SK but no reply. It was Seng Seng the greatest savior who woke up at night to check my message and lent his hand.

Seng Seng used colour printer to print my report with the big big UTAR logo. WOW!!! So good geh? Kena la belanja kari wanton mee + big + mee + kari + wanton + egg this time lol? But... the sad part, also the gelaba case 2 - although report was ready, but I left the graphs at home. Of 'coz have to attach both to call it a complete report. And I left my MB test 1 paper at home too - gelaba 3. I need to ask for additional marks as Dr. Tee had calculated my marks wrongly (whom I should have look for since month ago). Not to forget I left my Meta exercise 2 at home (gelaba 4), which I need to submit back to Dr. Teh last Friday. What happen to me? I tend to forget everything!!! Probably because of Genetics lab test later? Must be la, too focused on lab test and not aware of what to do next.

How's Genetics lab test today? Walao... Si beh die. Of 30 marks, half gone in drawing (suck up - sure no mark) while other half barely able to understand (have to ask answer from Piew!!!). Another gelaba liao lor? No mood already. Listen to the imperial march of Darth Vader, awaiting my time to face the death... Just as what Gideon post on facebook - "I'm already infamous...ur seniors here can tell u that there r some ppl who couldn't take Y3 paper n graduate coz they had to repeat n repeat genetics...haha..." -.-

I made a lot of mistakes today - Genetics report + MB test paper + Meta exercise 2. Why not submit the next day since I was already late? Since every small matters are marks (I need marks desperately) and I delayed long enough. I hope it's not too late - coursework marks will be released this week.

So, from Sri Petaling 7 a.m. to UTAR for test, return back Sri Petaling to get whatever I need (sambil kena sai for wasting petrol by mum), turn back to UTAR to do whatever left to complete (all done - 11.25 a.m.). Lucky no strawberry on the way. Is this makan angin or makan minyak?

And lastly, I had my hair cut in Silver Cut, by the same guy (thinnest, tallest, considered most lengzai in the saloon). Everytime a cutting session started, he will ask me the same questions - 1. Where are you from. 2. Where do you study. 3. What course are you pursuing. 4. How do you travel etc etc etc... I've been there 3 times, he asked those 3 times haha. He even promised me to play 林宇中's song each time I visit, but he never did. Who am I for him to remember? I am not important anyway. I asked him to cut cincai you suka la - my usual line. So he explained a bit here and there, wanted to change me into a 'yeah' style. No thanks, 'yeah' does not suit me. Cut the same short short hair again. He even asked me if I am interested to do hair treatment, which can nourish my scalp and reduce dandruff and oily hair - RM 30 per treatment. I was thinking - is my dandruff that bad that I need treatment, or are you just promoting? Or is my hair oily? Finished cutting in less than 20 minutes (sap sap sui la, cincai head ma), charged RM 15 huhuhu... See? After hair cut. Sorry for showing apek pic. I want my hair dyed next semester.

This afternoon I was so lonely not because I am left alone. To find out that someone lied to me, yet knowing that he's lying but he kept on lying hoping that I wouldn't realize, made me so lonely. If he knows he was wrong, can't he just admit and commit less mistakes than just double his "sin" at greater risk? I don't understand why he needed to lie. I wouldn't be so lonely if you had never lie.

Today was supposedly to have dinner with Dr. Chu and Mok, but the dinner was cancelled. Family had their own plan, so I was left alone tonight. I live in Sri Petaling for 10 years, I know there's no food worth as dinner to be found here. So another makan angin yang makan minyak is expected. Don't care la, petrol is still cheaper than mineral water if you compare to Avian mineral water. RM 1.80 vs RM 7.90. I wanted to call friends out but I don't know who to call. So I drive around from Sri Petaling to Salak South Garden to Kuchai Lama to Happy Garden looking for a place to quietly dine in and study - alone. Firstly dropped by Salak South Garden park, swinged on a swing for minutes to feel the hazy breeze while enjoying KL view from hill top. Oh yea, ate 2 fried dumpling at Fatty Mok Hakka Yong Tau Foo as appetizer.

I simply attacked here for dinner (after headache of driving many rounds, stopping at many eating places around Kuchai Lama considering prices of Wings Cafe and One Station etc)... Dim sum. I ordered the most basic dim sum - sang yok pao, lo mai kai, xiu mai, fish ball. Good dim sum or bad dim sum depend dearly on these few. Sadly the taste was... paksa paksa oso eadible la (deep in my heart - tak sedap langsung). Kulit pao thicker than inch, fishball too soft, xiu mai no taste. And what did they put in lo mai kai, ginger? Let's not talk bout freshness, you know what I mean? Dinner cost ~RM 12 - wasted money. Eii I am not picky on food ok, in fact I am easily satisfied. But some food is just suck, such as this dim sum.

The night was still young. After dinner was merayau-rayau session by car, red lights, green lights, plugged in modulator and my pendrive equipped with Kenji, Jam.s, JJ and Rynn - up to OUG McD for an ice-cream, back to Happy Garden Steven corner for garlic naan (what's this, supper?) and back Sri Petaling. What's in my mind? Petrol cheap ar run here run there? Nevermind la, tonight I let my demonic behaviour slipped out. No body's stopping me tonight. Again there's no star tonight, just a limp glowing moon behind the bank of clouds. Don't feel lonely, at least there're many drivers around me driving together.

These're from a dessert shop at Sri Petaling - Sweet Bean. Out of curiousity I entered, sat, opened the menu and simply pointed. So the food came real fast, I wasn't sure what they were. But I guess they're sesame seed black glutinous rice soup and sesame seed tang yuan. Not bad, not just some kind of sugar sweet dessert. RM 4.25 is a bit pricey though... - edited and added 19 February 2009

Again I made some turns around the roads, congested in pasar malam roads and managed to find a place to spend the rest of my night - Old Town Kopitiam Sri Petaling. Ordered white coffee (tak sedap), spreaded blood coagulation chapter on table while my mind blown somewhere. About an hour later they chase me away at 11.30 p.m. - tutup kedai!!! Anyway I managed to get that chapter done, at the very least one achievement of the day.

Again I am here, in front of computer wondering why am I doing these alone. Does anyone do the same like me when they're alone? I have no body tonight. My mind tonight, is myself. I thought I could make it throught the day. I just smile and pretend and tell myself I'll be alright but I went crazy on another side. Can you hear that? You can't? But I heard the sound of silence calling me... I'm sorry I was irrational tonight.

Have I felt any better after going here and there alone? Not when I am alone at this stage...

Oh, another filler for my bored posts...




[Jino] - A man's not man unless he knows how to shoot

Promises that you and I, me and you, he and me, she and me, they and me...

I realized, my mood recently started swinging all the time. At a moment I am very happy and the next moment I can shout at my mama. Feeling like wth, she gave me a tight slap. Nice slap! At least she stopped me shouting around like a moron.

My opinion about promises? Promises must be kept, must be fulfilled. Incomplete promises and empty promises are no longer my style. If I have no confidence in doing it, I won't even promise you. I learnt the day I left. Promises as simple as "I love you forever", "I won't leave you", "You are my only one" are very common couples intimidation. That will make them love deeper, to drive them nearer. They're too good to be true but how strongly would these words stand in the relationship after 3 months or 1 year?

When the love cease you will use the word "promise" - What did you promise me? You weren't real that time? How could this be? Forever?

Empty promises are easy to made. Maybe it's not hard to break one. But for people like me to break it, it seems to take me years for guilt to dilute. Don't you feel guilty for breaking the own faith you gave? It's like scratching your own face, it's disgusting. Breaking own promises leads me fear. How much can one take after confidence striped off? You had gotten your hand ready and I made them dirty. You are waiting me by your window but I never come as promised.

I did not just hurt one, but repeated twice the same. Not to mention some great impacts on my daily promises too... I am sorry everyone. Sorry man I don't deserve you...

Therefore, I don't simply make promises anymore, especially promises I know I can never fulfill. I afraid, I will once again disappoint you, break your heart again. And I don't want history to repeat... Hope that my stance won't break easily this time.

Speaking of promise, SHIT I have Genetics group report to compile and print but I have not done it!!! Must hurry to look for a printer now. URGENT!




[Jino] - A man's not a man unless he knows how to shoot

Personality test

My Personality

Neuroticism	79
Extraversion	14
Openness to Experience	35
Agreeableness	55
Conscientiousness	17

You rarely get angry and it takes a lot to make you angry, however you experience panic, confusion, and helplessness when under pressure or stress. You tend not to talk much and prefer to let others control the activities of groups. You are not interested in the arts and do not display aesthetic sensitivity. You do not like to claim that you are better than other people, and generally shy from talking yourself up, however you are not affected strongly by human suffering, priding yourself on making objective judgments based on reason. You are more concerned with truth and impartial justice than with mercy. You are a reasonably organized person and like to have a certain amount of routine in your life. Neuroticism Anxiety 88 Anger 14 Depression 72 Self-Consciousness 90 Immoderation 48 Vulnerability 99 You feel tense, jittery, and nervous and often feel like something dangerous is about to happen. You may be afraid of specific situations or be just generally fearful. You rarely get angry and it takes a lot to make you angry. You tend to lack energy and have difficult initiating activities. You are sensitive about what others think of you. Your concern about rejection and ridicule cause you to feel shy and uncomfortable around others. You are easily embarrassed and often feel ashamed. Your fears that others will criticize or make fun of you are exaggerated and unrealistic, but your awkwardness and discomfort may make these fears a self-fulfilling prophecy. You often resist any cravings or urges that you have, but sometimes you give in. You experience panic, confusion, and helplessness when under pressure or stress. Extraversion Friendliness 38 Gregariousness 22 Assertiveness 1 Activity Level 18 Excitement-Seeking 27 Cheerfulness 67 You generally make friends easily enough although you mostly don't go out of your way to demonstrate positive feelings toward others. You tend to feel overwhelmed by, and therefore actively avoid, large crowds. You often need privacy and time for yourself. You tend not to talk much and prefer to let others control the activities of groups. You lead a leisurely and relaxed life. You would prefer to sit back and smell the roses than indulge in high energy activities. You get overwhelmed by too much noise and commotion and do not like thrill-seeking activities. You experience a range of positive feelings, including happiness, enthusiasm, optimism, and joy. Openness to Experience Imagination 62 Artistic Interests 8 Emotionality 54 Adventurousness 11 Intellect 38 Liberalism 80 You are a moderately imaginative person who enjoys a good balance between the real world and fantasy. You are not interested in the arts and do not display aesthetic sensitivity. Generally you are not considered to be an emotional person, however you are aware of and in touch with your emotions. You prefer familiar routines and for things to stay the same. You can tend to feel uncomfortable with change. You enjoy a certain amount of debate or intellectual thought, but sometimes get bored with too much. Often you exhibit a readiness to challenge authority, convention, and traditional values. Sometimes you feel a certain degree of hostility toward rules and perhaps even enjoy ambiguity. Agreeableness Trust 97 Morality 40 Altruism 34 Cooperation 18 Modesty 95 Sympathy 13 You naturally assume that most people are fair, honest, and have good intentions. There are times when you believe that a certain amount of deception in social relationships is necessary, however you are mostly candid, frank and sincere. People find it moderately easy to relate to you. You will help others if they are in need. If people ask for too much of your time you feel that they are imposing on you. You are not adverse to confrontation and will sometimes even intimidate others to get your own way. You do not like to claim that you are better than other people, and generally shy from talking yourself up. You are not affected strongly by human suffering, priding yourself on making objective judgments based on reason. You are more concerned with truth and impartial justice than with mercy. Conscientiousness Self-Efficacy 13 Orderliness 66 Dutifulness 9 Achievement-Striving 10 Self-Discipline 17 Cautiousness 30 Often you do not feel effective, and may have a sense that you are not in control of your life. You are a reasonably organized person and like to have a certain amount of routine in your life. You find contracts, rules, and regulations overly confining and are sometimes seen as unreliable or even irresponsible by others. You are content to get by with a minimal amount of work, and might be seen by others as lazy. You find yourself procrastinating and show poor follow-through on tasks. Often you fail to complete tasks - even tasks that you want very much to complete. You often say or do the first thing that comes to mind without deliberating alternatives and the probable consequences of those alternatives.

Get your result today - http://www.learnmyself.com/ [Jino] - A man's not a man unless he knows how to shoot