Saturday, April 11, 2009

Nice fought battle

When was the last time we fought? PC Fair 13 Dec 2008. We fought well, at least we played a lot of emotions.

Another fight had just ended. All fights are not intended. I don't wish to fight, but I stand on my ground which I think best suit me and do least harm to all parties. If clashing of ideas are called fighting, I don't think I will have chance to rest anymore. Right?

Do you remember the reason behind both fights now? Now are we equal already?

Time to time we fight more often and get tenser each time. I hope war will not come, I don't want to die.

When all fights occur, who do I talk to? If I fight with them, I will have you to share. But now who else can I talk to? Roses or Ultraman?

I never imagine myself so emo at this rate. I thought I can be rational, or at least be patient is my only specialty. But when facing you I fail to tolerate, as I thought you are the one understanding me the most so I don't need explain many times. But it turns out to be me not understanding you enough. Maybe it's your way of caring that I couldn't understand? You care and I took it for granted? You worry and I ignored? Or has my emo blinded my rational senses?

It's my fault each fight occurs, I know. 'Coz I lost my tolerance... Am I getting stubborn? Do I start ignoring others feeling? Have I? Have I turned grosteque?

I regret changing into so open. If I am conservative and closed like a year ago, where my coolness was still peak, my attitude of quietness is my major defence... Perhaps fights will never happen, don't you agree? Maybe if I hide my emotion deep to myself we will not suffer like this?

That word never directly came out of my brain, I guarantee. I don't remember saying that if not 'coz of you. It's not what you think. I am sorry I used that word. I tarik balik and kill it.

Because of a simple, small matter and fights initiated, to think of it I felt so foolish...

I am sorry for all the damages of the fight. I don't know how else to apologize.




[Jino] - A man's not a man unless he knows how to shoot